Should we TASER RICH?!?!
Japan remembered its killer earthquake and tsunami yesterday on its first anniversary with a moment of silence, prayers and anti-nuclear rallies. The quake and subsequent tsunami killed thousands and caused a nuclear crisis that's still being dealt with today. The quake registered 9.0 on the Richter scale and spurred on a massive tidal wave that flooded Japan's northern coast, leaving 16,000 dead and nearly 3,300 still missing and presumed dead. One of the town's particularly hard hit was Ofunato, where residents dressed in black laid white chrysanthemums n memory of the 420 town's people who died or are still missing. Kosei Chiba, a 46-year-old man who lost his mother and wife, said, "We can't just stay sad. Our mission is to face reality and move forward step by step."
MARCH MADNESS IS HERE! YOUR IT DEPT. IS WATCHING YOU…
When March Madness kicks off with daytime games on Thursday, productivity will drop dramatically at offices around the country. That's because we'll be watching streams of the games or text updates on sports sites to make sure our brackets are doing OK. But one thing is trying to stop us from doing that -- your IT department! A new survey finds that about two-thirds of IT departments take some sort of action to block, ban or throttle non-work streaming content. When it comes to the NCAA Men's basketball tourney, 40 percent admit they monitor employees who try to access games on their computers, in order to protect the company's network. The survey of 500 IT professionals by IT staffing firm Modis says that 40 percent of companies have seen their network slowed down by March Madness streams.
THE MILITARY HAS SOME NEW BADASS HEAT WEAPON NOW OR SOMETHING…
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE KID DOWN IN S. FLORIDA WHO FAILED 3 CLASSES? YEAH, HIS SPRING BREAK SUCKS…
Michael Bell Sr. had enough of his son's bad grades and behavior in school, so he took an extreme measure -- he made his son, Michael Bell Jr., stand on the corner of a busy South Florida intersection over the weekend wearing a sign highlighting his academic lowlights. The front of the sign reads, "Hey, I want to be a class clown. Is it wrong?" the back says, "I'm in the seventh grade and got three F's. Blow your horn if there's something wrong with that." Michael Jr. heard plenty of honking horns. His latest report card, which arrived just days before spring break, had him failing civics, language arts and math. So now, Michael Jr. will be spending his entire spring break wearing the sign to shame him into improving his grades and behavior at school.
THE ANTI-DRINKING PILL IS HERE!
A new drug currently in development that makes alcoholics want to drink less is the first of its kind. The drug, called nalmefene, blocks the brain response that makes people enjoy the feeling they get from drinking, thereby lessening the urge to drink more. In ongoing clinical trials, people who took the drug in conjunction with counseling drank half as much every day and cut down on binge drinking. While drugs that aim to deter drinking by causing people to feel sick if they consume alcohol already exist, nalmefene is the first drug that reduces alcohol consumption overall.
BE CAREFUL ON THE NEW 408-417 INTERCHANGE TODAY!
WHAT DOES THE “PERFECT” WOMAN LOOK LIKE?
What does the perfect woman look like? Well, she’s got Anne Hathaway’s eyes, Natalie Portman’s nose and Scarlett Johansson’s lips! Australian Marie Claire asked top plastic surgeons across the globe about the most-requested celebrity features. Rounding out the list were Halle Berry’s jawline and January Jones’ cheekbones. Top it all off with Taylor Swift’s wavy blonde locks- apparently it’s the most-desired celeb hairstyle.
HOLY CRAP, AMERICANS SPEND TOO MUCH MONEY ON THEIR PETS…
Americans spent a ton of money on their pets last year- more than $50 billion! That’s a record high, as well as a five percent increase over the previous year. The top pet-related expense is food, followed by vet bills. But the area of spending that saw the biggest growth was that of pet services- grooming, doggy daycare and spa treatments (yes, spa treatments). Guess all those pet-icures must get expensive…
ST. PATTY’S IS COMING UP ON SATURDAY, DO YOU HAVE YOUR POLITICALLY INCORRECT T-SHIRT YET?
St. Patrick's Day is on Saturday -- and as you may have notices there are all sorts of Irish-themed accessories on the shelves. But not everyone is happy about this. In fact, some Irish organizations are demanding that shops like Urban Outfitters stop selling T-shirts and accessories with slogans that say, "Kiss me, I'm drunk, Irish, or whatever," "Irish I Were Drunk," and a trucker's hat that shows a figure on all fours vomiting and says, "Irish Yoga." Congressman Tim Crowley, head of the Congressional Ad Hoc Committee on Irish Affairs, sent a letter to Urban Outfitters CEO Richard Hayne, asking him to stop selling the products. "By selling and promoting these items, Urban Outfitters is only fueling stereotypes that many Irish Americans, as well as the people of Ireland, work so hard to dispel," the letter began. Seamus Boyle, a member of the Ancient Order of Hibernians in America (the nation's largest Irish organization), wrote in another letter that he's ready to organize a boycott if the products aren't removed immediately.
UHHH SORRY MA’AM YOU CAN’T VOTE, YOU’RE DEAD…
A Massachusetts woman who showed up to vote in last week's elections was turned away by poll watchers -- because she was "dead." Maureen McCloskey, who's 84 years old, but very much alive, kicked up quite a fuss when informed of her own passing. She managed to convince the folks handing out ballots that she was, in fact, still breathing, and still registered to vote. McCloskey said, "I read the papers. First the thing I look at is the obituary. And I said I didn't even find my name on the obituary page."
HERE STALKS THE BRIDE…
If you’re going to plan a wedding, you might want to make sure your groom is in on it! A woman from Des Moines, Iowa is accused of stalking a man for over a year and even planning their nuptials! Madeline Ann Desmet, 64, met the man in early 2010 and shortly after professed her “undying love” for him, even though he made it clear he was not interested in her romantically. Not one to take no for an answer, Desmet followed him around for months and kept trying to contact him by mail and phone. She went so far as to order a wedding ring and reserve a Seattle courtroom for the ceremony! She was finally arrested after the man received a call from a Jared jewelry store asking him to pay for the ring Desmet had selected! She guaranteed herself a definite “I don’t.”
IF YOU’RE GONNA BREAK INTO A MINI-VAN, MAKE SURE NOT TO LEAVE YOUR MALT LIQUOR BEHIND…JUST SAYIN’
There's a jail sentence on tap for a Florida crook who broke into a parked mini-van and stole some stuff -- but left behind a can of malt liquor bearing his fingerprints and DNA. Ahmad "Ace" Braxton left the half-finished Steel Reserve in the front passenger seat of the vehicle after making off with an armful of CDs and a sports bag. Cops quickly submitted the can for analysis and turned up Braxton's name in their database.
LET THE MARCH MADNESS BEGIN!
The No.1 Kentucky Wildcats (32-2) are limping and not so much marching into March Madness after suffering only their second defeat of the year, a shocking 71-64 upset by Vanderbilt. Yet despite the misstep, the bracketologists named Kentucky the No. 1 seed in the South while seeding Syracuse No. 1 in the East, North Carolina No. 1 in the Midwest and Michigan State No. 1 in the West. By the way: both Syracuse and North Carolina also lost over the weekend. As Ozzy Osbourne tends to say at all of his concerts before launching into his first song, let the madness begin. Here is the full bracket.
DON’T BE A DOUCHE, HERE’S SOME TIPS ON HOW TO FILL OUT YOUR BRACKET…
MASKED KOBE STRIKES AGAIN! AND LINSANITY IS OFFICIALLY OVER APPARENTLY…
Longtime rivals the Los Angeles Lakers and Boston Celtics met Sunday in Los Angeles only this time Kobe Bryant was content to play the supporting actor role while Andrew Bynum starred in the game’s climatic final scene. Bryant finished with 26 points in the Lakers 97-94 win, scoring 10 in the fourth quarter, including a go-ahead jumper with 41.7 seconds remaining in the latest L.A.-Boston melodrama. But with the game on the line and 15.5 seconds on the clock, Bynum hit a hook shot over Kevin Garnett and Boston’s hopes faded to black. After the game, Bynum acknowledged that not only did Bryant play second fiddle in the final act; the Lakers’ star actually was the director of the play that put him in the position to be the hero. Bynum said, “It was crazy. Kobe came up with the play.” Linsanity is quickly turning into an off-off-Broadway show as the New York Knicks on Sunday dropped their fifth straight game, this time being upstaged by the Philadelphia 76ers 106-94 and turn what used to be an 18-18 record into an 18-23 mess. Lou Williams was Philly’s leading man, scoring 28 points, while Carmelo Anthony went for 22 and Jeremy Lin struggled through 5 of 18 shooting to score 14 points while dishing 7 assists and turning the ball over 6 times. Here are all of Sunday’s NBA scores.
PEYTON MANNING SPENT A WHOLE LOTTA TIME IN DENVER AND ARIZONA THIS WEEKEND!
Sources who say they know what is inside Peyton Manning’s head say the former Colts great has narrowed his decision on where he will play next year to either the Rocky Mountains or the Valley of the Sun. The four-time league MVP ended a three-day road trip over the weekend in which he visited the Denver Broncos and the Arizona Cardinals, leading to intense speculation that those two teams are at the top of Manning’s list. But some still feel the future Hall of Famer hasn’t completely ruled out landing on the beach in Miami, though he’s yet to formally meet with Dolphins management.
THINGS AREN’T LOOKING SO GREAT FOR TIGER…
You gotta feel for Justin Rose. On Sunday, the 31-year old South African won the WGC-Cadillac Championship in Doral, FL by one shot over Bubba Watson and walked away with a cool $1.4 million. But the big news coming out of Sunday’s final round was that Tiger Woods limped away from the golf course, withdrawing from the tournament after hitting his drive on the 12th hole, getting into a golf cart and driving away in his own car. An hour later, he issued a statement that read in part: “I felt tightness in my left Achilles warming up this morning, and it continued to get progressively worse.”
TONY STEWART ROLLED THE DICE IN VEGAS AND IT PAID OFF!
Defending Sprint Cup champion Tony Stewart rolled the dice on a risky move on Sunday that earned him a jackpot and a win at the Las Vegas Motor Speedway. Stewart played his winning hand by gambling on a bold move just after a restart, dipping down and under two cars in front of him and eventually held off Jimmie Johnson to capture his first checkered flag of the year. Greg Biffle finished in third, Ryan Newman in fourth and Carl Edwards in fifth.
SNOOKI WANTS TO CALL HER BABY SHORTnTAN…REALLY?
Junior, Peanut, Sugarplum ... these are all common nicknames for our offspring. But now that the word is out about Snooki being pregnant, she has flashier plans for her first born's nickname. The Jersey Girl plans to call her little bundle of joy "ShortnTan." Heaven help us all.
BOBBI KRISTINA WANTS A NAME CHANGE!
Whitney Houston's daughter Bobbi Kristina wants to change her name "because of its association with her father Bobby Brown."
TMZ says she wanted to switch to Kristina Houston when her parents first split, in 2006, but her mother didn't allow it at the time. Now the 19-year-old is rushing to make the swap and is doing so with a "sober mind," according to the gossip blog.In an interview that aired last night on OWN, Bobbi Kristina said it hurts too much to listen to her mother's music, but she can "still hear" the late singer's voice. She told Oprah, "Lights turn on and off, and I'm like, 'Mom, what are you doing?'"
BRITNEY SPEARS TURNED DOWN THE $10MIL OFFER FROM X FACTOR!
Britney Spears' presence on the X Factor isn't going to come cheap. Brit has reportedly rejected a $10 million offer to be on the X Factor judging panel. Spears met up with Simon Cowell and the show ponied up the big bucks... but it wasn't enough for Brit. The show thought they were being generous, considering Jennifer Lopez took home $12 million for American Idol and Christina Aguilera made $10 million for The Voice. Spears is said to have declined the offer three weeks ago and is now considering a Las Vegas residency. She is reportedly asking Fox for $20 million to appear on the show ... sending the network and Cowell into a scramble to fill its panel. X Factor has already begun filming its season two auditions, but won't need judges to film until May.
RAGE IS THE LATEST BAND TO JUMP ON THE RUSH LIMBAUGH HATE TRAIN!
Another day and another rock act is angry at conservative radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh for using their music on his nationally syndicated program. On Friday, Rage Against the Machine guitarist Tom Morello told Rolling Stone he heard the toxic talker used “Sleep Now in the Fire” on his show. The band immediately fired off a curt and cutting message to the right wing host in which they simply said: “Hey Jackass, stop using our music on your racist, misogynist, right wing clown show.”
JON HAMM FROM MAD MEN CALLS PARIS AND KIM K. F***ING IDIOTS!
Jon Hamm has some harsh words for a pair of reality stars. The Mad Men star tells Britain's Elle, "Whether it's Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian or whoever, stupidity is certainly celebrated. Being a [bleeping] idiot is a valuable commodity in this culture because you're rewarded significantly." He continues, "The truth of it is, I have friends who work in TV and the Kardashians get higher ratings than their TV shows. Shows that people actually work hard on -- writing and creating and trying to tell stories. The fact that the Kardashians could be more popular than a show like Mad Men is disgusting. It's a super disgusting part of our culture." Daniel Craig recently told Britain's GQ magazine pretty much the same thing. "You see that and you think, 'What, you mean all I have to do is behave like a [bleeping' idiot on television and then you'll pay me millions?'"
KRIS HUMPHRIES DEMANDS $7MIL OUTTA KIM “OR ELSE”!
Kris Humphries wants Kim Kardashian to put up or he won't shut up. TMZ says the New Jersey Net is demanding his estranged wife give him $7 million "or she'll have to endure a potentially ugly public trial." Kim has reportedly told him to shove it. Kris is going to have a hard time getting a nickel out of the reality star. A prenup agreement guarantees he gets nada.
DICK VAN DYKE JUST ROBBED THE CRADLE AT 86!
Dick Van Dyke married makeup artist Arlene Silver on February 29th. He's 86, she's 40. Van Dyke met Silver six years ago at the SAG Awards, according to Rumor Fix. After being "bowled over by her beauty," he hired her to be his personal makeup artist. He says, "The last couple of years we kind of fell in love. She keeps up with me." Van Dyke adds they decided to get hitched "on the spur of the moment."
ARNIE’S SON PATRICK BUSTED HIS BUTT ON THE SLOPES…
Arnold Schwarzenegger's son Patrick was hospitalized Saturday in a skiing accident in Sun Valley, Idaho. Shortly after the incident, the 18-year-old headed to Twitter to say he was fine. He wrote, "Little ski accident today. Some bruises and stitches down back and butt. Thanks to Sun Valley doctors for everything." About seven months ago, his younger brother, Christopher, landed in the hospital after a boogie-boarding accident.
OH DARN, JOHN MAYER’S PESKY THROAT PROBLEM IS BACK…
John Mayer was convinced he had made a full recovery and he planned to make his concert comeback this spring by kicking off his first U.S. tour in two years next month ... but due to medical reasons, he just announced the tour is canceled. Mayer made the announcement on his Tumblr blog Friday, saying his throat problems have returned. In the post, Mayer explained that during a rehearsal last week something didn't feel and sound right, so he went to see a doctor. When he went in for the visit, a scope of his vocal chords revealed that the granuloma had grown back ... leading him to take an "indefinite break from live performing." Mayer apologized profusely to his fans, writing: "I'm pretty emotionally burnt out at the moment, but please know how hard I tried to resolve this and how disappointed I am that I can't perform this record yet. I'm completely bummed, especially for all of you who started making plans to see a show. Nothing feels worse than having to break the stage down before the performance, and I mean nothing. . .these are the new circumstances, and I'll find a way to make it mean something. That's all you can ever do." In October, Mayer had surgery to remove the granuloma (an enlarged nodule) just above his vocal cord and went on vocal rest for a month. Mayer wrote on his Tumblr, "In short, it's one giant pain in the ass." Mayer's new album, Born and Raised, is still scheduled for release on May 22. He also plans to begin working on a new CD "very soon."
STEVEN TYLER MADE SOME WAVES LAST NIGHT ON 60 MINUTES!
Aerosmith appeared on 60 Minutes last night, and frontman Steven Tyler showed why he can get his bandmates angry. He told interviewer Lara Logan that the rest of the band "rides my coattails" and that his "perfectionism and my busting everyone's chops" is what "brings us the hits." Guitarist Joe Perry said that he loves "certain sides" of Tyler and that he'll "put up with what I have to to have this guy in my band." As for his conflicts with Tyler, Perry says it never got physical because "he needs his jaw to sing." Tyler responded by wondering if that means they'll have a fight in the future and that "I sleep with one eye open when it comes to him" Tyler and Perry weren't the only members to show their bickering side. During a segment with Brad Whitford, he called Tyler a great musician and the camera caught Joey Kramer and Tom Hamilton looking at each other in disbelief.
COURTNEY LOVE’S ASSISTANT IS WRITING A TELL-ALL, CLAIMS SHE’S A ‘DELUSIONAL DRUG ADDICT’
DUFF SAYS HE’LL DEFINITELY BE AT THE HALL OF FAME INDUCTION IN APRIL!
What will happen when he and whichever of his former Guns N’ Roses bandmates show up is anyone’s guess, but Duff McKagan is definitely going to attend the band’s induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on April 14 in Cleveland. The bassist told Rolling Stone, “I know I’m going to go. I can’t, at all, speak for anybody else. And won’t. I’ll be there with bells on.” McKagan added that, “There’s been no communication about anyone playing.”
DEF LEPPARD AND POISON ARE HITTING THE ROAD!
Def Leppard, Poison and Lita Ford will kick off their summer tour on June 20th in Salt Lake City, Utah. The first leg hits 18 cities -- including Las Vegas on June 23rd, Denver on June 25th, Atlanta on June 29th, Tampa on June 30th, Cleveland on July 6th and Chicago on July 19th -- before wrapping up at Rock Fest in Cadott, Wisconsin on July 22nd. More dates will be announced soon. Def Leppard and Poison first toured together in the summer of 2009.
U2 CONTINUES TO KILL IT…
U2 came in second in Billboard's new Moneymakers 2012 list. The group brought in -- after taxes -- $32.1 million last year. The bulk of that came from the band's hugely successful 360 Degrees tour. Bon Jovi placed at number-seven with $19.8 million. Country star Taylor Swift landed at number-one with $35.7 million. The magazine compiled the list by calculating income from tour grosses, airplay, physical and digital sales, and streams.
BLACK CROWES’ CHRIS ROBINSON HAS TWO NEW ALBUMS COMING!
Black Crowes singer Chris Robinson has two new albums coming from his new project. The Chris Robinson Brotherhood will release their first studio album, Big Moon Ritual, on June 5th. A second album, The Magic Door, is due out in September. Robinson and the band plan to support both albums with a summer tour.