This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.
Call in Point:
(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)
Boy, today was a real whirlwind of a show with both Angi and Marris taking turns showcasing their unique skills. While I'll get to Angi's in a moment as it involved the Daily Discussion Topic and she went into full "mama bear" mode, Marris on the other hand showcased his manliness (see: rugged stupidity?) during a discussion about a viral topic ironically also involving a bear. After pondering if Marris could build a fire (he can't,) Angi introduced us to a currently viral question that seems to have a very easy answer. If you're a woman and you're stuck in the woods, would you rather it be with a man or a bear? Before we start dissecting the answer to this simple question, we looked at Marris' survival skill set. Apparently, he thinks he can survive for two weeks in the woods and even though he can not make fire, he would drink the non purified water he finds and just wing it. He has seen plenty of outdoor shows so he's pretty certain he can live off the land (I need someone to greenlight a show with him being dropped in a forest yesterday.) Anyway, rounding back to the question of would a woman rather be in the woods with a man or a bear, the resounding answer was the bear. When 8 women were polled on the street (I'm assuming this is how the question began and then went viral,) 7 said they would pick the bear. Obviously, this choice is very telling about the nature of men and how women view them. Even Marris thought the topic was kind of funny and jokey initially but when considering it, understood that it really wasn't. Some people feel that there is perhaps a lack of honesty in some of this but the reality is this is firmly a discussion about how women feel about men. A bear's natural instinct is to kill and eat you but a man is a more dangerous predator because there is a good chance he would assault you (and then maybe kill and possibly eat you.) Marris understands the notion of how men behave dangerously and was once a bodyguard to a team of women in one of his 87 other jobs (I should add "bodyguard" because even though he was boss, he felt protective of them.) They even had code words and hand signals in case issues arose which all things considered, is truly a wild way to have to live. Angi was complimentary of Marris protecting women as we all should be because it's not hard to be a good guy, ego just chooses to overlook that. To add another to the "I'd rather have a bear list," HP said she wants the bear as well because she has bear mace. While Marris questioned why HP carries bear mace, Angi went back to my earlier point on how a bear would just eat you. Marris added though that isn't fully the case as most bears are afraid of you outside of polar bears. If you happen to run into a polar bear in the wild, you're pretty much done. As we started to put this topic to bed, Angi added she too would choose to have the bear in the woods but also pondered why dudes are wandering around in the woods in the first place. Perhaps Smokey the Bear could have answered these questions but he disowned us when we burned down most of the forest last year.
Other Stuff from Today's Show
Now that we've tackled the Marris centric part of the morning, we found Angi becoming the hero during our Daily Discussion Topic. This was spawned by an FBI profiler offering dads advice on what to watch out for when a boy wants to date his teen daughter. This literally reads like a handbook from the 1960's only you know, with the ridiculousness cranked up. 1) Run a background check (on the 16 year old....) Get his name and check his Instagram, Snapchat and Facebook (because this is essentially a job interview as well.) 2) Gauge his dresing judgement, is he dressed appropriately to take your daughter to the movies? Judge the effort he put forth (to get this job, which I guess is plowing your daughter.) 3) Does he have tattoos or piercings (oh the humanity!) The more in your face he is, the bigger cry for attention it is (ok boomer.) Continuing on this clearly now job interview list is 5) let the conversation stop and see how he fills it in. 6) Directly state your expectations and watch his body language. 7) Check his car as he drives away, is it appropriate for his stage of life? Does he overextend financially and pick her up in a Bugatti, is it well maintained? For fun, write down his license plate anyway. This list is clearly deranged but it spawned a question of whether the roadies dated someone their parents hated. Angi, during her bad girl gone bad phase, dated a guy who was always bringing her home late and broke her grandfather's crystal glass and was hated after that. Marris apparently had a pile of girls as well but we didn't get to touch upon them as there were more pressing matters at hand. We moved to the Request Line and started with Blair, whose ex husband was a loser with no job who brewed beer in the basement. His money making scheme did not take off because the beer was terrible and well, apparently he never went anywhere after the divorce either. Eric's mom figured a girl he was dating was a little off and that rang true when she messaged him 10 years later and offered him $10,000 to marry her so she could become a U.S. citizen. Of course, this girl was a crazy Serbian because you know ... umm hmm. However, it was roadie Ali who brought things into a whole nother realm as she discussed the guy she's currently dating, Jesus aka the guy with the God complex. He thinks he's better than anyone else and once got into a neighborhood car racing duel with her father. The pair had been friends for 10 years and been dating for 4. I'm assuming his dumping trash on her parents lawn happened during the 4 year part. Both of her parents hate this guy and from the sounds of the call, he is toxic AF. Angi wanted Ali to dump this loser immediately and offered HP and herself as beatdown bodyguards to get rid of this alpha male a-hole. Ali apparently will dump him and let us know about it. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.
Next up, "they're going down, we're yelling timber!" is the Ke$ha rework I had stewing in my brain that rock stars keep wiping out on stage. We have a two pack of people to look at this morning starting with our favorite potato Vince Neil. The Mötley Crüe front man face planted on Friday while running out to "Wild Side" but he ended up being okay. This apparently has to do with the fact that he is actually a Weeble, that toy with the rounded bottom that bounces around but is never knocked down. Another acceptable comparison apparently is rolie polie or to be simple like us, a potato. The other to eat floor was Pearl Jam's Mike McCready who fell off the stage during the song "Porch." A roadie ended up helping him back up but like a badass, he had continued to play the song. Marris considered how we could keep our elder rock stars safe with yellow tape and bubbles but Angi had a better idea. We should just start strapping them into the Barbie doll stand that they had for Mick Mars and Ozzy Osbourne. Marris, in turn, offered to be a seeing eye dog for them on stage. One thing is certain, these are old men and we need to protect them at all costs so we need to do something soon!
Finally, this morning had two different food related stories so I'm just going to blend them into one for the sake. After all, you're probably exhausted from reading about the bears and men who are worse than bears (aka Ali's boyfriend.) A flight recently found 70 people ill and the assumed culprit was something that the people had eaten. If they were smart, they would have just gotten the Cup Noodles and had a ramen feast with airplane water, which I'm assuming would still be safer than Marris' idea of winging it and drinking water in the woods. The other had to do with a viral trend of people ordering pickles and Dr. Pepper together at Sonic and drinking it. Apparently, it has a salty/sweet balance to it as disgusting as it sounds and it does sound absolutely revolting. Angi suggested perhaps these people have evolved taste as she did not enjoy salted watermelon as a kid but now salted watermelon with Tajín is a treat she enjoys. To go a step further, a watermelon feta salad with Tajín is apparently an absolute taste jam for her.
Request Wars 3.5
Theme: Band or Artist You Regret Not Seeing in Concert
Current Champion: Angi (1x)
Angi's Song Choice: “Sex Type Thing" by Stone Temple Pilots
Marris' Song Choice: "Cochise" by Audioslave
Winner: Marris
10 O' Clock Toast:
Toastee: Ali
When your psycho boyfriend tries to run over your dad, dumps trash on your parents lawn and makes your mom cry, it's time to 86 him. Ali did get back to us and told us her delusional boyfriend thinks she's being irrational and won't break up with her. Angi and HP offered to roll up and put an end to things for good.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
"You're telling me there's a crazy Serbian lady out here, that doesn't make sense." - Angi
"How big is that pipe?" - Angi